Dear Itachi
by YourADDBuddy
Summary: After recieving Itachi's letter, Sasuke decides to respond as only Sasuke can: with a letter of his own.Sequel to 'Dear Sasuke'


Hello!

Since a lot of people really liked "Dear Sasuke," I wrote a sequel. Hooray for me!

It's basically Sasuke's response to the letter. Takes place before he runs away.

Once again…I haven't read that far past the time jump…that's my excuse.

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Warnings: ...meh.

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Dear Heartless Bastard:

What the hell is wrong with you? Why are you writing me a letter? What are you, my pen pal? And who did you get to deliver it for you? I'm guessing you were bored and had nothing better to do with your pointless existence on your stupid vacation. Hanging out with a shark can only be fun for so long. And don't go all narcissistic on me, you know as well as I do that I am way hotter than you. You and your old man face lines. And I don't suck, you do.

Anyways, how's your pathetic life going nowadays? Apparently, not so good. If your only form of entertainment is tormenting your younger brother by mail, you really are just a heartless bastard.

As of now, Kakashi-sensei has become my personal trainer. He's teaching me everything he knows, from ninja techniques to manipulating people. Not to mention looking underneath the underneath. I'll be able to surpass him in no time. As long as I stay above that dobe, I'll be fine.

What is this crap about me and Naruto? There is nothing going on! Its lies, lies! Why doesn't anyone believe me? Yes, we did kiss in the academy, but that was purely an accident and we hardly ever talk about it. He's my rival and friend, nothing more.

And yes, I did run through three cities, but not just because of that idiot. I was coming after you. You expect me to sit and wait it out when you killed our family, attacked my mentor, and tried to kidnap my best friend? You really lack all common sense, don't you? And what do you mean, 2nd base, we're only 12!

What do you mean you visit me? Are you like, a stalker or something? Why would you care what I'm doing? Do you really want to die so badly that you have to check up on me? If you really came, you would have seen the awesomeness that is me already. Since we last saw each other, I've gotten stronger, faster, and I've mastered the Sharingan. So nyah!

I will admit you are right about the fan club. The girls are bad, but the guys are even worse. They annoy me to the point of madness. Sometimes I just want to shake the pink one; she is so bipolar (though she's not the only one I know…). But they do make me feel pretty. Never thought about the ANBU that way…

But I did think about how you killed the family. How you were testing yourself. I know you were 13, but that doesn't make people evil. You trained to be a ninja and were trusted to do the right thing. I had trusted you to do the right thing. I guess I was just too naïve.

But do you honestly think I would believe you? Killing mom and dad because of that? You are psycho. I mean, I admittedly wouldn't want to marry a relative either, but you could've gotten out of it. Mom and dad were nice, they would have listened. And even if they didn't, you could have run away without massacring everyone. You were supposed to be a genius.

Well, I guess genius leads to insanity. I mean, who in their right mind would have a swishy ponytail, wear red clouds on a black cloak, paint there finger and toenails purple, and call it stylish? That doesn't even match! The colors clash horribly! And no one in there right mind would want to be seen in that. But I forgot, you're not in your right mind. You're a freaking psycho! Before you say you're so awesome, have a look at what real awesomeness is. Also known as me.

Killing Shisui was an accident? ACCIDENT?!? Oh, so I guess throwing your best friend into a river because you were mad can always be considered an accident. Of course. And sparring and talking are always interchangeable. If it was truly an accident, why did you work so hard to cover it up with a suicide note? Is the Mangekyou really that great?

I don't believe you. This is just your twisted way of repenting.

And guess what? I'm going to go with Orochimaru. He's a legendary sannin, why wouldn't I? He's not a pedophile, he just likes little boys more than most people do. And I can handle myself. You're just jealous that he prefers me over you. And he doesn't just want me for my body. Besides, he has Kabuto, doesn't he? Ok, maybe not, but still. He has given me an offer I can hardly refuse. With that kind of power, I will defeat you faster than you can say 'I Feel Pretty.' Watch your back, weasel.

-With Loving Hate,

Sasuke

P.S. I'm hotter than you anyways. Have you seen me lately?

P.P.S. Naruto says hi…he is so dense. AND I DON'T CALL HIM DOBE ALL THE TIME!

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1. Sasuke's personality—if Itachi's narcissistic, what does that make Sasuke?

2. 13 and evil—I think it's kind of ironic that Sasuke ran away at the same age Itachi was when he massacred the clan.

3. Sasuke really looked up to Itachi, so there's the little dramatic moment of emo.

4. Orochimaru's desires—didn't he want Sasuke more than Itachi? I don't remember…

5. Itachi's outfit—I tend to rant about characters outfits, what can I say?

6. I used the word awesomeness a lot…is that even a word?

If it wasn't good, oh well. Reviews are always loved.


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